Legacy Updates (2004-2013)

5 Years Long. 5 Years Strong.

Yo everyone! It is time for celebration, inebriation and admiration of the creation of this here congregation that we call Triality. Just this past month we celebrated our 5th year anniversary as a guild, and in true Triality fashion, here is the late front page update telling you all about it.

Five years is a long time to do anything. I haven’t done anything for that long consecutively except get balder and fatter. But anyone, from any guild that plays hardcore EverQuest, knows how difficult nearly impossible it is to keep things together for any amount of years – especially five of them. Five years is a long time for a guild to stay rolling and keep our head above water. Lucky for us, we don’t just keep our head above the water – we dive into the shallow end and piss in the kiddie pool. And for some reason, that makes us a better, stronger, guild year after year. Nobody knows why; don’t ask. So this front page update is just a nod to the times we’ve had and the times we’re gonna have. So sit back and put on your readers as we reminisce; putting the mental in sentimental. 0.0WIDT?


• The History of Triality •

2002

  • Oct

    Orruar’s water breaks. Triality spills forward in a red and raging mist.

2003

  • Feb

    Emperor Ssraeshza is destroyed.

  • Jul

    Rallos Zek the Warlord is smashed.

  • Aug

    Solusek Ro killed at 8:00AM in the morning while <Eternal Advocates> tried their best to stop us from gaining Plane of Fire access.

  • Sep

    Fennin Ro, The Tyrant of Fire is extinguished.

  • Oct

    Xegony, The Queen of Air is deflated.

  • Nov

    The Rathe Council & the Avatar of Earth take a dirt nap.

  • Nov

    Coirnav, The Avatar of Water is flushed, despite <Caer Cadarn>’s best efforts to stop us.

  • Dec

    Quarm is drawn and quartered.

2004

  • May

    Uqua, The Ocean God Chantry is tactically infiltrated.

  • Jun

    Noqufiel is assassinated.

  • Jun

    Quarken begins doing front page news updates at TrialityGuild.com. Lonely housewives everywhere now have something to masturbate to other than cookbooks and minivans.

  • Jul

    Txevu, Lair of the Elite is raped and pillaged.

  • Oct

    Triality beats 4 out of 6 Muramite Proving Grounds Raid Trials before anyone else.

  • Oct

    Triality becomes the 2nd guild to enter The Asylum of Anguish.

  • Nov

    Naturalhealer Evertease completes the first Cleric Epic 2.0 quest in the entire game – Aegis of Superior Divinity

  • Dec

    Medaan Songweaver completes the first Bard Epic 2.0 quest in the entire game – Blade of Vesagran

  • Dec

    Dalnoth Domination completes the first Rogue Epic 2.0 quest in the entire game – Nightshade, Blade of Entropy

2005

  • Jan

    Triality is the 3rd guild to rescue Jelvan.

  • Feb

    Tunat’Muram Cuu Vauax and the dungeon of Tacvi are defeated.

  • Mar

    Sony commandeers the Death Star and blows up our home planet of Vazaelle. Maelin Starpyre was far too remote for an effective demonstration.

  • 19-matav2

    Jun

    Overlord Mata Muram is defeated with only 47 people (6 clerics) & before the mask debacle was uncovered.

  • Jul

    Vishimtar the Fallen is felled.

  • Sep

    Triality nearly disbands in our darkest hour.

  • Dec

    After rebuilding the guild & regearing new members, Triality kills Sendaii, the Hive Queen with only 48 people (4 clerics & 1 retard) to gain access to the The Demiplane of Blood. Officially sponsored by Alcoholics Anonymous at this point.

2006

  • Feb

    Redfang gets his wings clipped.

  • Mar

    Mayong Mistmoore has been slain by Triality.

  • Mar

    Triality finishes the Depths of Darkhollow expansion with a respectable 7th place finish after nearly disbanding in September and being the 30th-something guild to enter the Demi-Plane of Blood.

  • Jun

    Triality enters Deathknell, Tower of Dissonance.

  • Jul

    Ayonae Ro has her throat sliced.

  • Oct

    Solving the bugs and puzzles of King Odeen, Triality becomes the 1st guild into Frostcrypt, Throne of the Shade King.

  • Nov

    Lorekeeper Grenwald and the first dungeon of Frostcrypt are defeated.

  • Nov

    Movie: Frostcrypt, Throne of the Shade King.

  • Nov

    Beltron the Shade King and the second dungeon of Frostcrypt are defeated.

  • Dec

    Lethar the Black and Ashengate, Reliquary of the Scale are defeated.

  • Dec

    Triality finishes The Serpent’s Spine expansion in 1st place. Becoming the first guild from both the Vazaelle and Maelin Starpyre servers to deliver a game-wide 1st place finish and setting many first place achievements along the way.

  • Dec

    Movie: Ashengate, Reliquary of the Scale.

2007

  • Mar

    Triality is invited to be featured in Sony Online Entertainment’s “Feel The Burn” Solteris raid preview movie.

  • Mar

    Movie: Triality, Class of 2007 featuing every member of Triality at the time it was made.

  • Jun

    Triality finishes The Buried Sea expansion in 1st place – 20 days before the 2nd place guild & 72 days before the 3rd place guild.

  • Jun

    Movie: A Night in Solteris a.k.a. “Why?”

  • Jul

    Movie: Solteris, Throne of Ro.

  • Aug

    Movie: Triality Shrouds vs. Lord Nagafen

  • Oct

    Triality celebrates its fif anniversary. You are here.


Holy shit, that was a lot of things we did. And you know, looking back on all those good times, I was reminded of the members, or almost members in some cases, that we came across. You know, the members who’s names we’ll never forget – and not for the good reasons. Now, we’ve seen a shitload of people come in and out of our doors over the years and Dalnoth and I don’t have the greatest memory however…

After much research and intense analysis, we complied a list of the worst most trashy players to ever ride beside us. The list was lengthy at first, but we whittled it down to the Top 10 most terrible-wrapped-in-awful candidates. And, I don’t know about you, but I can’t celebrate properly unless I’m half-cocked and ripping into someone to make myself feel better. Don’t be confused, you aren’t about to read the starting lineup in this year’s Special Olympics wiffle ball team; this is Triality’s Hall of Shame.

10. Neomatrixx
Neo gets the benefit of number 10 because he lasted the longest out of this pile of failure. Neo’s offense: He never met a pixel pussy he couldn’t digitally diddle. I would say I never saw Neo grouping with men, but I’m pretty sure 90% of his cyber-queens were packing in the pants behind the screens. On top of that, Neo had a nice habit of conning huge sums of platinum from unsuspecting ‘friends’ to fuel the IGE.com industrial complex. These EverQuest subscriptions ain’t gonna buy themselves, ya know.

9. Healszorz
This guy had the healing capabilities of an AIDS Super Soaker™ and the brains of a child trapped under the ice in December who gets found in June. He single-handedly paved the way for ‘judge applicants by the stupidity of their name’. So he comes in at number 9 because that was one good thing he didz0rz.

8. Broagg
You may remember Broagg or should I say broagg.com/live-webcam-boi.htm When Broagg wasn’t snapping into a riposte discipline at the worst possible times he was offering to haul out his ‘1hb’ on his webcam for anything with a vagina. I’m pretty sure he retired and became lonelygirl15.

7. Dorgamer
Dorgamer built his EverQuest portfolio with Triality and then decided to invest his profits in Momentum. I don’t know how well that worked out, but I did see him at the PoK bank filling out Chapter 11 forms and some repo-man was seizing his weapons and armor. He might have not made the list if it wasn’t for the fact that he made the decision to leave us in the middle of a Redfang fight. Stay classy, pal.

6. Dezyn
Dezyn could have been an great member of the guild if she wasn’t always so busy flying around the world to exotic locations doing photo shoots. Because, you know, she was multi-million dollar supermodel. I think it was around her extended break in Sweden when she finally got the boot. The lying wouldn’t have been so bad is she didn’t send her picture to every single person in the guild trying to really sell the lie.

5. Faidian
Someone get Faidian a cab to the library right now! We need backup! Faid’s ISP went out one night, and being such a dedicated and hardcore player that he was, he went all the way to the library to make a post explaining his internet troubles to us and how he was very sorry he couldn’t raid with us that evening. Unfortunately for Faidian, Nuntius PI was on the IP and noticed that Faidian’s house and library had the same IP address. Whoops. Instead of accepting the hilarious embarrassment, Faidian dug himself into a pit of lies of which he couldn’t climb out. The motherfucker could rock the ill Dewey Decimal System though. Word up.

4. Bruizerr
In the 5 years we’ve been a guild, Bruizerr stands out as the worst applicant in the history of Triality. Classic Bruizerr moment: Strapping Hatchet the Torturer to his chest and carbombing not just the entire raid, but specifically the rez corner we had setup. Let’s not forget about the time Bruizerr single-handedly depopped The Performer by miskeying emotes. Denied.

3. Cerco
When you can’t find help for your Epic 2.0 quest at 3AM when only 10 people are online; 6 of which are AFK and 4 of which are bots, do you:
a.) Wait until tomorrow
b.) Flip the fuck out and deguild
c.) Flip the fuck out and deguild, talk shit about your former guild, troll their forums talking shit, deny any of this ever happened and then months later, to this very day, spam every officer in your former guild apologizing and begging to return. C for the answer. A for persistence. F for life.

2. Alwayys
postapplication?ENDMAC I’m not really sure about Alwayys. I think his massive system of third-party software became self-aware like Skynet and posted the application to the guild for him. Terminated.

1. Volt
Volt had the benefit of being our only Enchanter for a short period of time. And within that short period, he became an ego torpedo and thought he was the cat’s meow. The self-proclaimed King of All Enchanters took his skill of being able to mez 67 mobs simultaneously elsewhere, along with the majority of our strategies. Unfortunately for Volt, our strategies only work for us and not hastily created, second-rate, Johnny-Come-Lately shitter guilds. He realized this though, and then tried to actively recruit our entire guild into his team of failure. Unlike most of the Horrors of EverQuest listed above, Volt still actively carries disdain for anything and everything Triality. And this, my friend, has you batting in the lead-off spot for this Top Ten Team of Failure.


Now, we don’t want to seem like a hateful and bitter group of people. So now that we’ve highlighted the worst people we’ve come across in five years, I think we should throw some props out to the good shit. We’ve had a ton of members over the years who have come and gone that were/are just amazing players and megawesome people. To list them all here would be like impossible. That being said, few people retire and are missed as much as this guy and few people made us collectively laugh and question our faith in humanity as much as Fishlip. And since he was always a staple in the quote section of these updates, we’re going to take a look at the best of the worst of Fish’s whacked out brain over the years.

http://trialityguild.com/t-img/news/q/20041014/Boyfriend.jpg

Well that’s really it. Just a fun relaxing update for now. The new expansion, Secrets of Faydwer, drops soon so look back here for toetags and teabags on the corpses of everything it brings to our doorstep. So, to everyone in this guild past and present, I raise my 12 ounces of Pabst Blue Ribbon in the air and salute. Here’s to swimmin’ with bow-legged women.


Originally posted by qxx • Oct 29, 2007 14:17

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