Yo everyone. The long overdue update of our smashing and grabbing in Crystallos, Lair of the Awakened has finally arrived. Kind of. I’m not going to recap every little encounter in this place. Actually, I’m not going to recap any encounters! Most of it is old news by now and if I did that, one of us is going to be bored to death by the end. And as much as you’d want it to be me, it’d probably be you. So, I take mercy upon thee. Why don’t we kick this bitch off the hinges with some recruitment information.
Moving right along, I have to say this update is a bit lack luster for me to be doing. Truth be told, I logged on 5 or 35 minutes late for raids on the night we killed Kerafyrm the Awakened. I took the tardiness to bake up a couple of DiGiorno’s and ate the hell out of them. Shortly thereafter I got hit with the -itis and slept through the entire historical victory.
So, I don’t want to speculate on how the victory went down, you know? I don’t want to take the time to write a lot of nonsense about something I haven’t seen yet, right? It would be retarded to come here and act like I’m informed on the ins-and-outs of the event when I hadn’t personally witnessed it. I couldn’t accurately or intelligently speak about the encounter’s details or difficulty. Am I rite?? M I RITE??
I mean, I could do all those things I listed up there. Maybe it would be some sort of therapeutic exercise to speak with unfiltered ignorance. Maybe that would get me more in-sync with the people littering the EQLive forums doing exactly that.
Or maybe, we can do something fun for everyone. This presents a unique opportunity for us. I was thinking an interactive update would be lovely since I’m lazy and you’re bored. So, let’s do this thing together. Below, you can write the rest of the update in your own special way! My 6th grade grammar skills were really put to the test here. I’d be lying if I told you I didn’t Google the shit out of parts of speech. Grammar Nazis: raise your red pens, it’s time to Mad Libs.
That was so fulfilling. We should do the rest of the updates like this. I’m sure you’ll agree!
Ok, Serious Man™ time now. I want to congratulate all my brothers and sisters of Triality for getting this shit done proper and grabbing another game-wide 1st place expansion win. In addition to that, we’re putting together a Crystallos raid movie. I’d guess that should be completed and posted here a month or so down the road. We’ll be here farming our asses off until the World Series, at least.
Here’s to swimmin’ with bow legged women. Cheers. I’m going to go get drunk.